Nightingale, Balham Wed, Sep 21 2016 20:00

Cunning Stunts steal Meat Platter

Mark W

Mary Berry's Soggy Bottom and The Ramsden Rebels had every reason to feel robbed of the chance to win tonight's Jackpot having demonstrated that they are both quite well aware of roughly how wide Venus is, in terms of her diameter. Both were spot on to the nearest 100. Whilst it was surprising to me to learn that the dimensions of our nearest planetary neighbour are so familiar to the people of Balham, the appropriately named Cunning Stunts anticipated that they would not be alone and so rather than give an answer to the nearest 100 they gave the answer to the nearest 100 and added 1, which you would agree was a cunning stunt to pull, Spoonerisms notwithstanding, and made them clearly the nearest to the right answer.

The jackpot at the Nightingale now stands at £500, so the Cunning Stunts had but three envelopes to choose between, only one of which would contain the jackpot. They won instead, the meat platter, which is quite a respectable prize.

"it's not £500 though, is it?" they said.

I replied "No, it's not £500, but if you had won the £500 you'd probably have also won two other angry teams chasing you with burning torches and pitchforks, so in some ways that was the luckier draw!"

So that does mean that there is still £500 to be won next week at the Nightingale.

In other news: a family of stegosauri were the clear winners of the Plasticine round; not to be confused with the Pleistocene round - stegosauri were extinct by the Pleistocene - they're late Jurassic. This masterpiece is the work of the team who call themselves Half Marks.

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